Why can't Demetrius swim? Because he has a genetic disorder where he is paralyzed from the waste down, so he is therefore incapable of propelling himself through the water

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A man adopts an orphan. He waits till the child is a teenager to tell the news. He then commits suicide as to scar the child emotionally for the rest of its life.

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Yesterday I saw a black kid outrun a white kid know why? Because the white kid was a cripple

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what did the boy with no hands get for christmas Gloves!!! just kidding i dont know he hasnt opened the box yet

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If you rape a prostitute is it shop lifting?

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What did Helen Keller say to Michael Jordon before she died? Nothing...

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why did the man fart? because he felt like it.

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Do you know what's hilarious? Not rape.

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I had a great joke to tell you. I didn't want people stealing my ideas so I didn't write it. Haha

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politically correct!

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How many times has Belle Ahern been hit in the mutt 76. Stupid slut

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Why did the surrealist go to the doctor? Knock Knock.

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What do you get when you cut a stick of butter? a butt.

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What do you call a black person on a bike? A cyclist.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? His health was dwindling ever since he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer several years ago and this looked like the end.

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My dog has no dictionary. How does he spell terrible?

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What is worse than Justin Bieber? Well, 1. Deforestation 2. Hurricanes 3. Diabetes 4. Mass Murder ....and probably much more.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers... how about you.

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What do blacks and the night have in common? Their both worse than when it's light

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School

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If at first you don’t succeed, you clearly weren’t the right person for the job. We’re sorry, but we’re going to have to let you go; please collect your belongings and vacate the premises immediately.

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if a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound? if a tree falls in the forest and it falls on a mime, does anyone care?

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What happens if you play CS:GO? Well you loose alot of fucking money.

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Where do cows go for entertainment? Nowhere, most are slaughtered, processed, and eaten by humans.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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