- Anti Joke

How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

A wife asks her husband if he can fix the sink and he responds with Do I have plumber written on my forehead. Then she asks him if he can fix the porch and he responds with Do I have contractor written on my forehead. So the husband goes on vacation and comes back to find the sink and porch fixed and he asks his wife how it is fixed and she says that the new neighbor helped. So she says the neighbor said he would only do it for cake or sex. The husband respond by saying Which one did you choose. His wife responds by saying Do I have Betty Crocker written on my forehead.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

Anyone??????????/

Why did the blonde walk into the wall? I lied it was nathaniel nugnes

whats the best thing ever to happen to chuk norris ? he was born !!!!

can i have 10 pounds to go to the cinema?

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

Call me a banana. You're a banana. No I'm not

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

Roses are Roses Violets are Violets I am to Literal, That is a statement.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The third one is for you

Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 is bigger.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

your mom is so old, she is often confused for your grandmother.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the most direct path to his destination.

Knock, knock. Who's there? HIVs.

Knock Knock Sorry, I'm in a full body cast and can't answer the door.

Q:what's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat A:The wheel chair

Why did the blonde flunk out of school? Because she was a fucking idiot.

Roses are black Violets are white I'm colorblind

Your mom's your dad's wife. Except when she's not.