Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's red, hairy, and squishy? Helen Keller in a blender.

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EAT YOUR DINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What do you call a midget on the moon? A midget.

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Roses are red, Violets are BLACK!

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who killed more poeple than jeffory dommer, john wayne gayce, and ted buny combined cancer

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Justin's humor

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I was (really) asked one day by a guy if I wanted to star in a porn movie... Before I could even think about it he asked my 14 year old sister "Do you want to join in too?" And that kids, is why I am stuck in jail for pushing up a boot up a guys ass... Well replace boot with dick, and guys ass with my 14 year old sister and yeah... Naw... seriously she has hueg boobs though... at the age of 14, damn those melons have not even gone a bit greenish yellow and they are still growing... ...Hey Cassandra, its NeroMetal, good thing I am not your brother and that you are 19 right? NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THAT NEROISM DUDE THAT CHATS HERE, I play videogames, and write books, and sign books... ...Then some guy sees my real name is Nero and goes that guy on horsehead network? Who? HE SUCKS! SUCKS ASS!

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Your momma's so broke she might be eligible for government assistance. Seriously she should totally look into it.

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to buy plus size clothes because small size clothes would be inappropriate for her to wear.

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An Irish man walks out of a bar..... 'nuff said

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

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Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

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Tell me you're a rapist. You're a rapist. This joke makes no sense. Mashed potatoes.

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Why was Newton surprised when the apple fell on his head? Because he was sitting under a pear tree.

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Knock knock How is ? Bond ,James Bond!

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No.

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Whats the difference between a Philadelphia Flyers fan and a pedophile? What they are.

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Why is a building called a building when it's already been built? My pinky is pink and my liver helps me live.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

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Why did Devon move out of his mom's house? His mom beats him.

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Religion.

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Two twins are born only a minute apart. There is a mistake at the hospital and they are seperated. Years later they reconnect on Oprah and realize they do not have much in common.

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What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide? where to find some cheap cyanide

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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