Would you believe me if i said... ^^^^ You read that line wrong?

What battle did Napoleon die in? His last one.

How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

What's funnier than 24? 25

Spongebob: Patrick! Can you hear me? Patrick: No, it's too dark.

What did the train say at the party Thomas isn't really dumb ass

The queen is killed on sunday there are three suspects the cheif the princess and the butler The princess' said she was getting lunch The cheif said he was making lunch The butler said je was getting the mail So who did it A: the butler they dont diliever mail on sunday

how many times did lucy's mom drop her baby on its head? none, her mom died giving birth.....

Who got sarah pregnant? No one knows. She was a whore.

- Knock knock - Excuse me, I don't have time, my house is on fire ! - We're the firemen.

Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. Are you a grapefruit? No.

Rudolf the rednosed reindeer died today. He was reported flying over Madrid when he was hit by a jumbo jet and a flock of seagulls. People are now saying that the reindeer in Spain was hit mainly by the plane.

If life hands you lemons you're probably a hippy because you know someone named 'life'

Why Was Mary Short? She Had No Legs.

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

What do you call a Chelsea fan on the moon? You don't call him anything... You call for help.

Why did the clown go to jail? For 23 charges of rape and murder.

Whats fast, dead and make of CGI. Paul Walker

What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

Say this to someone: On a scale from one to ten, what is your favorite color?

How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool

yo mama so fat that when she jumped on her tempurpedic mattress the wine did spill

Why did the robot cross the road? Because it was a banana.

A: you have a strong arm. B: yea i work ou- A: you can master bate a whale.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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