Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? Because she was a mother catering her child's sporting event.

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Q: Why was the little boy upset? A: His nose was glued to the sidewalk.

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What did the pillow say to the dragon? Nothing, because pillows don't talk, dragons aren't real and this is a highly improbable circumstance.

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yo mama so fat she decided to go on a diet :)

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What did the mexican say to the black guy? He asked if he needed some drugs. Why? He was a pharmacist.

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Jack and jill Went up the hill To go smoke Some marijuana Jack got high Unzipped his fly And asked jill "Do you wanna?" Jill sais "yes" Pulled up her dress And things got real fun But silly jill Forgot the pill And now they have a son

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knock knock. who's there myhairs myhairs who myhairs fallen out

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it had earlier escaped from its cage and had since began to wonder around the local town

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A child is watching Saturday cartoons when is father walks in and, the child is aware that the father was on an all night binge and is verbally abused

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What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage.

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Women's rights.

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How do you make someone think your wierd? Pretend to be a panda.

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A man was walking along and got his legs shot off. He then proceeded to calm his wife and children and buy a wheelchair.

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A girl and her family were walking by a cliff. Suddenly - due to a a part of the cliff falling away - her family fell over the edge and died. The girl ran to the bottom of the cliff and saw her family's body's strewn across the rocks, blood everywhere. She didn't have a phone on her and so could not call the police. She called over a man she saw in the distance. He asked "What's happened?". Just managing to stammer the words through her tears she said "My entire family fell off a cliff and died". The man unzipped his trousers and said "This really isn't your day is it love?"

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Breast cancer.

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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There are two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other "dang, it's really hot in here." Realizing that muffins can not talk the other muffin wakes up to a very hungry man biting his face.

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Why did the man sit down? Because he was tired of standing up.

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raisin boogers

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what do you call a small midget? a smidget.

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Tom: So I heard a pretty good Anti-Joke the other day. Jim: Oh, I love those!! What was it? Tom: [says nothing]

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Cleveland winning something

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Why did the woman lie down? She was dead

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Did u hear about the fire at the circus? 12 people died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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