What does a man and an orange have in common? Nothing.

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Justin's hair

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Two black men and a latino board a plane together. They are members of the Marshall High School football team, and all die in the subsequent crash.

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Q. If your rowing a canoe up a tree, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon? A. None because snakes don't have armpits.

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i love to lick...

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Too bad, because UNTIL YOUR FUCKING "POWER OF HUMAN KIND" CAN SUMMON UP A FUCKING EYEBALL! NOTHING WILL MAKE UP FOR THIS SHIT! "Oh, my the good old phonebook, I will... Now... try... to... seduce... you... with... my... "goodness" As far as "oh I know where you live", well nobody here is hiding fagface! So you come out of your "darkness or shadows or whatever" and let me stab out both your fucking eyes! And we are STILL NOT GOOD! And yeah, have your faggots stop calling themselves Nero.

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Johnny Depp is Alexander Graham the whole time.

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What do cats eat for breakfast? Cat food.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

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How do you kill a Jew? The same way you kill any person. It could be gunshot, strangulation, hanging, poison etc. They are the same as every other human being, so you would kill them just like any other human being.

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What happens when you give a Jew an iPhone? He says thank you and gives you a hug.

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Q:What do you say to an albino man that will always get his attention? A:His name.

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A nig-ger walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand. "do you have any lemonade" the man said "no. we don't serve nig-gers lemonade. but you can drink your own piss boy, thats home made.." the nig-ger waddled away (waddle waddle) till the very next day. The nig-ger walked up to the lemonade stand with a lawsuit file right in his hand and said "you are legally required to serve me lemonade" the man said "fu(k you nig-ger, go back to where you came go back to Africa it's full of aids" the nig-ger said "goodbye".... i'm too lazy too finish this off so i'll spoil the ending, the nig-ger was actually a smelly pakistanian, which was actually a dirty chi-nk in costume. let's just say lawsuits were filed but the lemonade stand owner had casey anthony's lawyer and in the end never had to serve fu-cking nig-gers, smelly pakies or dirty chin-ks again :) The End. Happily Ever After.

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Yo momma so stupid when I said drinks are on the house she went and got a ladder

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Q:How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? A:Depends on the volume of said tub.

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Dave and Tim walk into a bar. The bartender says to Dave: "What'll it be?" Dave is black.

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Why didn't the dinosaur cross the road? Because they are extinct and roads did not exist when they were alive.

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What did the 20-year old woman say too the old man? HI GRANDPA!

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A horse walks into a mans house. The man wonders how the horse got into his house.

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I was playing Black Ops online, my wife turned it off in the middle of the game....I killed her

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A cow walks into a bar and said, "Bartender give me a glass of milk!"

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: to get to the gay guy's house knock knock who's there? the chicken

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What's the difference between a bench and a Mexican? The bench can support a family.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops