A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman walk into a bar and the barman asks "Is this some kind of a joke?"

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Knock, knock Who's there? Not your dead Nan

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What's black, smoking, and sitting at the top of the stairs? Steven Hawking after a house fire.

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Knock knock. Who's there You are.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because the walk sign said to

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Why did the car cross the road? Green light

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A chicken walks into a barn.

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your dad called night and told me your grandpa died.

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7

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Whats the similairity between a dog and a cat? They're both cats, except for the dog.

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How do you know if a black man was in your house while you weren't home? When you let them enter to babysit your children.

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What's green and has wheels? a green car.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was pursuing his dream of becoming the world's best circus clown, which six developed a fear of in a tragic circus accident which occured in his childhood. Therefore, six was afraid of seven.

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Fortunately," said the snooty maître d', "we'll let you come in without a Thai.

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A man went to the doctor with a strange complaint. "Well it's like this Doc, when I drive to work in the morning through the country lanes I start to sing 'The green green grass of home'. If I see a cat then it's 'What's new, pussy cat?'. It's so embarrassing, even when I'm asleep and dreaming, I still keep singing. Last night, it was 'Delilah', and my wife was not amused!" "Yes, it would apear that you have the early symptoms of Tom Jones syndrome." "Well I've never heard of that, is it common?" asked the man. "Yes," replied the doctor, "It is very uncommon."

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven murdered sixes wife and kids and said he was next.

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what do mexicans like most. icecubes

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Whats the difference between Steven Hawkin and Gary Glitter? Ones severely disabled and ones a paedophile.

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What do you call a vehicle has 56 wheels? Anything you want, because it hasn't been invented yet.

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Safe sex MR

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A homeless man walks into a house He is invited to a lovely lunch and then beaten to death

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whats the difference between justin beiber and a gay guy? both guys and girls like gay guys

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What did the little boy become for Halloween? An orphan, his parents were killed that day.

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Maroon 5 to a bitch: Cross my heart and hope to die... wait why don't i just kill you bitch!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops