Q: Why did the kid drop his icecream cone? A: Because he couldn't hold it he lost his arms in a car accident.

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What happens when you divide by zero? According to the limits in Calculus, 1/x as x approaches 0 becomes closer to infinity, so we can safely conclude that if we could divide by zero, it would be a form of infinity. Positive infinity for 1/0, negative infinity for -1/0 and unsigned infinity for 0/0, as zero has no sign.

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why does jake have so many guns? hes compensating

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Fun Fact getting married to your first cousin is legal in CT... bet you thought there was joke coming right about now..........

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How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

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Q: Why is Santa's sack so big? A: Because he only cums once a year

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why did the man beat his wife because he was mean

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

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How do you know if an elephant has been in your fridge? If it is laying in pieces around the crumbled wreckage of your house. [L]

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how many babies dose it take to paint a fence it depends on how hard you throw them

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The parking lot was across the street from KFC.

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- Knock knock - Excuse me, I don't have time, my house is on fire ! - We're the firemen.

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Why are you so stupid? Becuse I spelled because wrong

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Why was there an awkward silence? Because numerous people gathered in a room were not talking.

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Why did the beautiful woman marry the ugly poor old man? She was blonde & was therefor not aware that he wasn't rich nor younge.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? The list goes on.

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Q: Whats blue and fluffy A: Blue fluff Q: Whats brown and fluffy . A: The bear that killed my parents.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken had no legs and was therefore incapable of committing to such a challenge.

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What do you call it when you mix a raccoon with an 18-wheeler? A bloody mess on the highway. That smells like cheese

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What is red,brown and stinks? A deer that's hit by a car

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue The mothership came and your did a whole lot of scam

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why did the cow eat a computer? Why? Who knows

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whats green at the bottom of a hole and covered in cookie crumbs a girl scout run over by a truck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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