What's black can run really fast and jump really high? A panther

A woman walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, my water just broke." The doctor replies "Get off my carpet."

How do you help someone stop drowning You take your foot off the back their head.

What did the guy say to the blonde? "You're a blonde."

whats worse than 911 nothing you cant beat 911that sucked

hiya

Why did the mother tell her son to get a job. She was tired of buying Generic brand food.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you thro them

what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? Nazis did't burn the pizza

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No-one because that's not feasible.

When time is the best time to make a wish during the day? 9:11

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman notices this rather humorous cliche and proceeds to point it out, laughs are shared by all.

If you walked into a grocery store right in the middle of Cuba what won't you see? The missing Malaysian MH370 Boeing.

want to hear a dirty joke tommy fell in the mud a clean joke he took a bath with bubbles bubbles was his neighbor

The other day I saw this dog. It said woof.

How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

Why did the rabbit jump? Because that's what rabbits do.

Q: why did suzie fall out of the swing? A: because she was a pinecone

What starts with f and end in uck Firetruck

yo momma so fat. that shes fat

what is sticky and brown?a stick

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Hearing this joke again.

A- knock knock B- whose there? A- Chuck Norris B- chuck norris who? A- are you retarded?

Knock Knock Who's there? Nobel Nobel who? There was no bell, that's why I'm knocking you idiot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...