When life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians.

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What did the Big Chimney say to the Little Chimney? Nothing, chimneys are unable to talk.

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Your grandma and your mom drove of a cliff, who survived? Both of them they didn't drive off a cliff

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How long did it take azaha to have a shit? Nine months

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A panda , a cheetah, a dog, a spider, and an eagle are in Antarctica.. The eagle looks around at the other baffled animals and says " What is this????? This isn't right! I'm so confused!"

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Why couldn't Suzie ride the swings? She got hit by a refrigerator.

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Kefka > Sephiroth

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What is Santa's favorite color? Blue

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Stare at the person nearest to you and say "sprinkles" with the straightest face possible.

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The grass is always greener on the side that uses manure and fertilizer daily.

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Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? To honor his father, Jonathan "Red" Hoffner, who was tragically killed in the line of duty. While attempting to save 3 small children in a trailer park fire, the elder firefighter suffered 3rd degree burns over 80 percent of his body. "Red" was rushed to a local hospital and lingered for several agonizing days. He began to rally but a careless error by a night nurse led to his unfortunate demise. His son was psychologically unable to wear anything but red suspenders every day for the rest of his life - not only because of his father's death but also because it was he who had maliciously set the fire in the first place.

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What happened to the famous musician when he overdosed? He overdosed.

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What's black and white and red all over? A referee eating a red Popsicle on a hot summers day.

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A man knocks on a wooden door. A woman says who is it?

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A man named Joe has practiced drawing cartoon characters his entire life. When Joe turns 15 he decides to enter a local drawing competeiton. Joe works very hard drawing his cartoon and finally finishes. When it is the time to hand in his drawing his drawing, he hands it in an receives a satisfying 2nd place and continues on with his life. Two years later Joe decides to enter another drawing competeiton (this one much more competitive) after his drawing skills have tremendously increased. He begins drawing and is 3/4 of the way finished when Joe is brutally murdered by a mentally disturbed man and cannot hand in his art work and is therefore disqualified from the competeiton and loses.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a Sociopath with a very violent history.

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what do jews like the most? money, because they're all greedy fat nosed cunts

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Q: What did the Big Bad Wolf say to Little Red Riding Hood? A: Nothing, wolfs are mentally nor physically capable of talking

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Whatsup?! Your grandpas chance of dying.

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A blind man asked me out last night. I told him I was seeing someone...

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Why does blond women give great blowjob? Because they has vaacum in thier heads! Blond woman coment; well thats better than having nothing at all in your head! :-)

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A girl walks into a strip club, she was tired of her husband and wanted to see how it was actually done.

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How did the blonde die raking leaves? She fell out of the tree!

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Do you know the muffin man? No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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