A girl asked for lip balm. She put some on and her lips exploded.

At least I dont have AIDS.

What`s red and smells like blue paint? A sunburned baby drinking green paint.

Once upon a time, I farted They believe this now as the "Big Bang"

Why did the mailman cross the road? To deliver mail

What's similar between my butthole and shampoo? They both smell good, except for by butthole.

"I have some good news and some bad news, which do you want to hear first?" The good news. "There is no bad news." Then what's the bad news? "There is no bad news.

How do you get money out of a Jew? You convince him your cause is worthwhile.

Why did the clown want a new bike? Don't ask me, clowns are allowed to want things too

What do you call a black guy driving a Mercedes through New York? A U.S. Citizen

A man walks into a bar. The bar is closed and the man is a thief. The police are promptly called in fear that the situation may become increasingly dangerous.

What did the orphan get for christmas? Glaucoma.

*Knock Knock *Whos there? *ADD *ADD Who? *I forgot but you wana build a fort.

So I went to my grandmothers house at 7 and left at 8.

Roses are red, Violets are pretty, look at their team, Surrender at 20.

Whats worse than runing over a box of kittens? Runing over two boxes of kittens.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not doing your Webtime on a Friday!!

What is a Mexican's favorite restaurant? While the term "Mexican" encompasses a wide range of individuals and individual predilections, the most common cibarious preference would likely be a food that is reminiscent of his or her homeland; that is, what we refer to as Mexican food. An authentic nearby joint sporting such provisions would likely be the most common preference, but, as this description can only be traced on the local scale, a specific restaurant that covers a wider range of locations would be a more appropriate answer. Among the top choices are Taco Time and Taco Del Mar.

How do you escape prison? Kill everyone in it hen once you have escaped find their families and viciously murder them. Are they going the send you back to prison? No because you will kill everyone.

Knock Knock Go Away

Are you from Tennessee? Because you accent is really not hiding it

Misner is a twat.

Your mumma is so stupid her IQ is 40.

-What do you call it when a female and male are together? - A very serious relationship.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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