What happened when the zombie walked into the blonde lady convention? He went home hungry.

How can you kill someone who looks like a squirrel? With an bomb. That would kill most people.

Roses are red, Violoets are blue, I accidentally shat my pants. Brb

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

The Definition of Megan Bates 800 Hamburgers

Why was the black man in prison? He was wrongly accused of a felony and the jury by whom he was tried was largely racist.

if your were a slu* what would you do dance on a pole or get a tattoo

Q:Do you know why Jesus would not be a good goalkeeper? A:Because he never played football

Why are lizards broke? Because they run around the desert with no money...

What's the difference between an elephant and a moscito? There are several differencies. Firstly, the elephant is a mammal and the moscito is an insect.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had several drinks, conversed animatedly, and heartily enjoyed themselves.

What did little Timmy get his grandmother for Christmas? A coffin

knock knock who's there? orange orange who? orang you glad i didn't say knock knock agian

How many wooden chairs can a black man staple to a whales forehead? 27 because Helen Keller does not like blueberries.

How many jews can fit into a car? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, 6 million in the ash tray

Anyone??????????/

PLEASE LIKE TO DONATE 50 CENTS TO MY CHARIDY .... SAVE THE PENGUINS IN AFRICA -BY LUKE BRANIFF

Yeah sure, you have "absolutely... ...No... ...Reason..." to... Fucking... use... This... place... at... all... But you seem to be here all the fucking time, what fucking sense does that make? That is not the matter at all fagface! Your fucking goons assaulting me because "I stole one of your aliases?" I was born Nero and will die fucking Nero, not Nerometal, not Nero of Neronism, just Nero your friendly rapist! Yeah Ill give you my fucking social info, so you... and... your... excessive... use... of... this shit... can... send... your ...fucking assholes to finish the job! Listen bitch! I am a writer! And your faggots stabbed off like half of my eyeball! I don't give a damn about this site, I want your fucking assholes to stop seeking me out in person! Hell, give me your social info, so we can "make a fucking settlement" Where I break off your head and shit down your neck!

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

The queen is killed on sunday there are three suspects the cheif the princess and the butler The princess' said she was getting lunch The cheif said he was making lunch The butler said je was getting the mail So who did it A: the butler they dont diliever mail on sunday

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After tesco's horse burgers, what's next? My lidl pony

What has a black, blue, and red all over? Timmy. He was mugged, and vigorously raped.

Whats worse than a joke? This

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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