What's white and hides in a tree. A refrigerator.

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An irish man walks out of a bar

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Scholars maintain that the translations to the chickens journal were lost in a hurricane hundreds of years ago. Therefore, the chicken crossed the road for unknown reasons and died knowing it had a dull, pointless life.

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1.....2.....3.....boom you died

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your moms tits are so big she may have breast cancer she may have breast cancer which takes approximitely 300,000 lives per year

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What did the guy and girl do at the wedding? Nothing, The guy is gay

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Excuse me waiter! What the hell is this fly doing on my soup? I believe it's swimming on it, sir.

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Why did the fortune cookie taste bad? I forgot to take the wrapper off.

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Why was 2 afraid of 3? Because 345!!!!!

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A blond walks into McDonalds. She orders and leaves.

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Knock, Knock Whos there? Docter Docter who? Yes its me, Craig Who your docter, I have the test results back Im afriad its positive,you've only got a few months left

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How do you fit a whale into a truck bed? You can't, whales live in the ocean.

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Once upon a time there was a nice old man who loved to ride his bike... He unfortunately died when he had a heart attack.

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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How long would it take for a clock to reach 12 It depends on which 12 it is going to land on and which time zone you are in but yet most clocks are not correct so it is very hard to tell

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What black and white and red all over? A panther I was lying about the red and white.

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Why did the gambler sell his house? Because he needed money to pay for male hookers.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Your at your local street corner and find a woman, the fact that she has balls dose not stop you from inviting her into your car.

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Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? -getting raped by 10 very hung men who go balls deep

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what do you call a football team without players a group of coaches

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What's small, black,and crispy? A baby after an apartment fire

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why did the little boy drop his icecream? he was hit by a train

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops