What did the man get when he returned from Africa? AIDS

a man said hi.

What is brown and has three legs? A horse. It lost a leg in a glue factory.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

How do you stop a group of black guys from fighting? go over to them and ask them politely to stop.

I'M JOSH BROWN!!!!!

What do you call a black person driving a plane? A pilot, because you dont want to call him anything racist i mean he is driving you up 25,000 ft in the air and the last thing you want is for him to get mad and decide to do something rational, God, you racists.

How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

How do you make a blond shut up? Staple her tongue to the roof of her mouth and super-glue her lips together.

Two muffins were in an oven. One muffin said "Wow, its hot in here." The other muffin said "Oh my gosh a talking muffin!" The house burnt down because the oven created a fire.

Why doesn't little billy eat his vegetables at the dinner table... Because billy has bin dead for 3 years

Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

0 + 0 = 0

PLEASE DONT READ THIS OR YOU'LL BE DIED IF YOU DON'T POST MESSAGE ON LIKE DIFFERENT VIDEO

Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red. OH SHIT THE GARDENS ON FIRE!

What is purple and green at the same time? Grapes, I lied about at the same time.

knock knock who's there? the milk man the milk man who? the milk man who brings your milk every morning

Wanna know something funny? Your face

You wanna hear a joke? Me too

If Chuck Norris had five dollars and YOU had five dollars, he could still punch you in the face for free and get ten dollars out of it.

Yo mamma's so fat, that she weighs alot.

Did you here that Hellen Keller got hit by a bus? No. Neither did she.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven raped and murdered eight's family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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