Where did the taxi driver put his suitcase down? celery

Why doesn't Squidward wear pants? Because he's a pervert

How many wooden chairs can a black man staple to a whales forehead? 27 because Helen Keller does not like blueberries.

Billy and Suzy sitting in a tree... Billy is gay.

black people

A woman walks into the kitchen to make a sandwich because she is hungry and she likes sandwiches.

Why did the teenage boy touch himself at night? Because he was shot in the stomach by his drunken father and was trying in vain to stop the bleeding.

Chuck Norris doesn't wait in traffic, he takes the subway

What would Hitler say if you give him a sandwich? Thankyou!

Where do fat girls go to eat doughnuts? Jenny Craig

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

your moms tits are so big she may have breast cancer she may have breast cancer which takes approximitely 300,000 lives per year

An Asian man, a black man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They all buy the same drink, are charged the same price and say " We are all equal! " They then continue on with their days normaly.

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Who is the fiercist Raptor of them all? Matt Daly

charlie sheen losing

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

What did the Arab do when he got frustrated? Burned himself

I see said the blind man to his deaf wife as his crippled son pushed him in his wheelchair.

Whats worst then finding drugs under you brothers bed finding your dead cat under his bed whats worst then finding your dead cat under your brothers bed finding your dead Gran whats even worst then that the Holocaust

I once had my heart broken by my first true love. I then died, she was convicted of murder and my family grieved over my death.

Q. What did Nelson say to his men before they boarded ship? A. "Board ship men"

Q: Whats the difference between nude pics and your mom? A: I can wackk off to nude pics

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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