Help iv fallen and i can get up -blarg

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What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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What did the rapper Proof say when he got in a fight? Nothing, Proof is dead.

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Why did the bus crash? What, you were expecting an answer? I was asking you

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Hey I just met you, and this seems crazy. I have Alzheimers... Hey i just met you.

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Why did the tortoise cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Roses are red violets are blue this is an anti joke so like this

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Q: What do you do when you meet someone new? A: You don`t know and expect me to do so? Get a life!

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Q: What game will Helen Keller always win? A: Marco Polo. She is a fast swimmer.

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What smells bad and is black, A very dirty dead decomposing body.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cook Pu. Ok then. Kelvin Yang.

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally becase she fell off the swing.

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Why wasn't the drunk driver arrested when he killed a man? Because he died as well.

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What would a prostitute do if she was given a million dollars? She would probably diversify her portfolio. First, she would pay her rent. She would buy some groceries and a present for her mother. She would then invest it in stocks and low-yield bonds. She would they buy a vehicle. This win might not affect her continuance in her job.

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Justin Bieber.

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Ever heard of the dumb blonde joke? You probably wouldn't get it.

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Your mother is a stupid bitch. For real.

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I always wanted to know what the future will hold in the decades to come... Until I realized the idiotness of my own thought for it is nigh impossible for us humans to see the future... Except... That the ancient Mayan civilization prophesized the end of the universe, which I did take into consideration as I slowly nibbled my way through the waffle cone till I had realized that I had reached the paper surrounding the cone and immediately spat it out for it leaves a fowl taste In my mouth, then continued eating my ice cream as I pondered the future and the anti-climatic ending of this anti-joke.

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I scream. You scream. We all scream and huddle in a corner of our first grade classroom because of a masked gunman.

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What is a homeless man for Halloween? A garbage bag

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What's the difference between an elephant and a moscito? There are several differencies. Firstly, the elephant is a mammal and the moscito is an insect.

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why was the black man forced to sit at the back of the bus ? it was a busy day.

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A drunkard stumbles into the bar. Now he's got thousand's of dollars in medical bills.

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PENIS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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