your momma so dumb she put a battery up her but and said i got the power!!!

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why do i have a pain in my left side i dont know but im scared

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What kind of cheese isn't yours Nacho Cheese actually it depends on the type of cheese that you stole due to your kleptomania

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What did one volcano say to the other? Hey.... wana get some lunch... later, not now of course it's WAAAAY TOO EARLY!

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A black man is a human, with feelings, living cells and a loving and devoted family, while a park bench is made from wood and metal and used purely for people to sit on. In parks.

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You idiot.

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Why did the 6 year old girl go to therapy? Because her step dad raped her.

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Why did Santa's little helper feel depressed? Neurotransmitters essential for happiness, such as serotonin and norepinephrine, were in rather low supply in the poor elf's brain.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why can't Ray Charles see his friends? He's blind. Also he is dead.

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What do you get when you cross drugs with a bathtub? Whitney Houston's worst nightmare

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Roses are black Violets are too I am a dog I don't know how to rhyme

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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What to you call a heavy person, Someone overweight

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What did the duck wear to go swimming? A bathingsuit!

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What's black and white and red all over? A chess board; I lied about the "red all over" part.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swing set? Because she didn't.

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They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

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What is the worst part about being a blonde? Random green painted strangers throw forks at you claiming it will confuse you, because they got it off of an anti joke website!

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A man climbs up a tree. Once he reaches the top he is scared and thus incapable of getting down.

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How does a man with no arms and legs get to your door. After asking his name please help us out with this question

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What's old and has wet pants? My grandma with a bladder problem

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why am i a dick head. because my gcse's spelt fudge and i dont like fudge so i project my anger into boss things

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A nig-ger walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand. "do you have any lemonade" the man said "no. we don't serve nig-gers lemonade. but you can drink your own piss boy, thats home made.." the nig-ger waddled away (waddle waddle) till the very next day. The nig-ger walked up to the lemonade stand with a lawsuit file right in his hand and said "you are legally required to serve me lemonade" the man said "fu(k you nig-ger, go back to where you came go back to Africa it's full of aids" the nig-ger said "goodbye".... i'm too lazy too finish this off so i'll spoil the ending, the nig-ger was actually a smelly pakistanian, which was actually a dirty chi-nk in costume. let's just say lawsuits were filed but the lemonade stand owner had casey anthony's lawyer and in the end never had to serve fu-cking nig-gers, smelly pakies or dirty chin-ks again :) The End. Happily Ever After.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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