Why was 2 afraid of 3? Because 345!!!!!

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What do you get when you mix red and blue? Gang violence.

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Your mom is so poor, she can't afford nice clothing.

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The skeleton walks into a bar. Everyone is confused and leaves.

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A man is sitting at a bar. He stands up and goes over to these bikers playing pool. He then walks over to the bartender and says "I bet you three hundred dollars that I can pee in that bottle over there." The bartender looks at the bottle and sees there is a good five meters between the two. The bartender then agrees. The man takes out his penis and begins to pee. His pee stream goes everywhere on the bar, on the cash register, and espicially on the laughing bartender. It goes everywhere except inside the bottle. The man finishes and zips his pants. He then smiles at the bartender while handing him three hundred dollars. The bartender asks "why are you laughing you lost three hundred dollars?" Which the man replies "See those bikers by the pool table laughing?...I bet them five hundred dollars each that I could pee on your bar, on your cash register, and on your face and you would laugh and be happy." The bartender then reached under his bar and toke out his bat. He then continued to break the mans knees and then perceeded to pee on his bruised and battered face.

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What should you do if you come across a slut with a fork up her @ss and a gun in her hand? Do not look at her and walk away.

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why did spiderman fall off the roof ? cause it was wet

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What does Spiderman do everyday? Aunt May

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Holy crap, the garden's on fire.

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Teagan Doherty, stop making jokes, thanks

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Why did the fat man go to America? Because he was excited to get of work for vacation.

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What's Jewish and gay? Henry Shine

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What's hard, long and full of seamen? an erect penis.

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Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. Are you a grapefruit? No.

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Your mom's your dad's wife. Except when she's not.

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Why did the girl scream? Someone shot her mom

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Knock Knock Sorry, I'm in a full body cast and can't answer the door.

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your mom is so old, she is often confused for your grandmother.

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Q:what's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat A:The wheel chair

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Women's rights.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

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Why was Sally rolling in the grass? She was on fire.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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