Why was the child lying in the scrap yard? because he was being torn apart by guard dogs.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? I don't know it really depends on the car, usually about 2 in the front, 3 in the back and... That's about it

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A convict escapes a prison he's been in for 15 years. He's soon tracked down by police and put back in jail where he'll serve another 2 years of jail time along with his 5 remaining years.

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When Kylie and Conner have a baby he will have a centimeter Schmeter!

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Why did the crack addict see colors. He was looking at the northern lights

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There are four dead people on a boat. They commit suicide. Why did they commit suicide. To get to the other side!

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what did the blind deaf orphan get for christmas? cancer

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r jerks n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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A dyslexic man walks into a saloon and asks for a hair cut.

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What happened to the deaf, dumb, and blind kid? I don't know. Niether does he.

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irish wristwatch JLR

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What do you call a man with 3 arms, 6 ears, 9 fingers, and a red clown nose? His name.

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Who has killed more people than Jeffrey Dahmer, John Wayne Gacy, and Jack Kevorkian combined? Mr. Rogers

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What'd the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish, remember?

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Question: What did Mr. Reeves say. Answer: Nothing

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Fox News.

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What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? Nothing. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said objects are, are in no way capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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I didn't choose the thug life... I got a job.

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why did the chicken cross the road because the farm is across the street from were it is now

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did you hear about the platypus that was found dead in the middle of death valley?

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Q: What dosent a Jew and a pizza have in commen? A: The pizza dosent scream when you put it in the oven.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? a lot.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To find some grain.

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How did the fat guy die? After an autopsy, it was discovered he was unaware of his type 2 diabetes and therefore did not treat it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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