What is the greatest lie ever? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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What is the difference between a motorcycle and a football? 42, because ice cream has no bones.

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Yo mamma is so old that she died.

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The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action

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Why did they bury the pope on the side of the hill? because he is dead -Eden Hogg

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Why did Jimmy fall out of the tree. Cause' I shot him.

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Q. Dr.evil? JHHHHHHHHOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN

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Erectile Dysfunction.

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a mother cow walks up to her three child cows. the first cow asks: "mom, why am i named rose?" the mother responds with: "because when you were a baby, a rose petal fell on your head." the second cow asks: "what about me, mom?" the mother says: "when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." the third cow says: "AAAAOOOOOOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO!" the mother screams: "SHUT UP REFRIDGERATOR."

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A dog walks into a bar. He asks for a drink in perfect english. People scream at the dog's ability to talk and scientists burt in and take the dog to dissect and study his brain, vocal chords, and dna.

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well, I'm dying of AIDS, so....

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what do you do when you see a black guy with half a face. call an ambulance because hes most likely in serious pain

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two pigs in a bath one says to the other can you pass me the soap..the other replies..do I look like a typewriter!?

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What's white and capable of flash photography? A pony, I lied about the photography.

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Canada AYY

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What do you call a muslim flying an airplane? A pilot.

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Why did the black person got to Wal-mart? Wal-mart has relatively low prices

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What did the badger say to the mushroom? BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER MUSHROOM MUSHROOM! BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER ARGH SNAKE! IT'S A SNAKE...

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

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Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga? one of them is a women the other one is not.

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What did the hat say to the other hat? Nothing, because hats don't talk, stupid.

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theres a fork in a drawer half way open and a knife in a cup on the counter. how does the knife get into the drawer, it cant knife are incapable of moving

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A white man walking dpwn the street finds a brief-case with a timer on it. A young muslim man says he dropped it. The white man then asked "What's the timer for"? The young man said, "Nothing really, just helps keep the time." They both went their separate ways.

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A Muslim walks into a bar. BOOM

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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