A guy walks into the bar and orders a coke with some ice and some peanuts. It cost a total of $4.00 plus tax. He gave the bartender $5.00 and told him to keep the change. He drank the soda pop and burped loudly and left the bar and forgot his peanuts.

Jake was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. His wife looks down and sees a scale.

Your mother is so stupid she couldn't get a passing score on a standardized test.

What's sad about four black people going over in a cliff in Cadillac? It was my Cadillac.

whats the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on the trampoline

There was a Black and a Mexican in a car, they were on their way to church.

Why was the girl crying? Because she was brutally raped

What is a Will And Dan put together A WillDan HAHAHAHAHA

What starts with an N and ends with R, that you wouldn't want to call a black person? Neighbor

There are two types of people in this world: Those who can finish lists. and

Two gay men walk into a bar. Holding hands.

How much does a Polar Bear weigh? Approximately 500 lbs

Okay okay, its not like I wanted a serious answer anyway, bye!

Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 had a gun.

how do you stop a bus? Well, just up the road is a stop sign so the bus will stop there because it is illegal to go through a stop sign without stopping.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm homosexual And so is my boyfriend Jeremy, with whom I have shared countless evenings of joy and laughter.

Barbara Streisand

Why did the housewife become a farmer? Because the kitchen was burned down in a horrific accident.

The big male boar went out the forest, saw a group of women and start to swank.

Q: What drug did the addict do at the Grand Canyon? A: None; after years of battling substance addiction, he came to realize the social, financial, and health consequences had significantly degraded his quality of life and was apalled by his bad decisions.

What do Connecticut school kids get at Christmas? Shot.

What is worse than finding a worm in ur apple Idk I am asking u

A horse dies and goes to heaven. He wonders why there aren't any atheists around.

what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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