How many people with Alzheimers does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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It's a man's 100th birthday, and as one of his last wishes he wants to go skydiving. Unfortunately, due to his crippling arthritis, he was unable to pull the rip cord on his parachute and plummeted to his death.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i got 5 Fingers, the middle ones for you ?

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There are 3 poeple on an air plane. The pope, a boy scout, and barak obama. The plane is about to crash and there is only 2 parachutes. omba said im the president of the united states and one of the worlds smartest african americans so he jumped out. The Pope told the boy scout " i lived a long happy life you take the last parachute and jump." The boy scout replied what there are still 2 left the " worlds smartest negro jumped out with my backpack.

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ADAM SAS IS A GREAT GUY!

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Dave: My wife just gave birth! The baby is doing good. John: You mean doing well?

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Why did the chicken kill himself? Because he was bullied as a child and is now suicidal

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you know whats not funny? the Holocaust

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What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

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What's yellow and highly dangerous? Shark-infested banana pudding.

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Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England? A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

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What happened the the blonde that went swimming? She cooled off and enjoyed a hot summer day.

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Whats white and looks like a bunny? a rabbit

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Do you want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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How did the fat woman survive the car accident? She had on her seat belt.

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Question: What did Mr. Reeves say. Answer: Nothing

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A dog walks into a saloon and says "I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw." The patrons are afraid of the talking dog.

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(This is a joke made up by the young son of a friend of mine many years ago. It is still one of my favorite jokes.) Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why was the 6 year old girl crying? Her step-dad kicked her in the face.

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How do you upset an Mexican? Kill his entire family.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a convicted serial killer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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