Friends are like snowflakes When you pee on them they disappear

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

Why did the boat salesman cry? Because a puppet killed his family.

3 black guys are in the back of a car. Who is driving? A taxi driver

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

A blind man walks into a bar. I mean a fence.

One day I was hungry. I ate. I wasn't hungry anymore. Penis.

your momma's so fat i almost didn't have sex with her.... almost.

if a fat man in a red suit puts you in a bag at night. its not santa your getting raped

your momma is so fat that she thinks someone hugs her each time she passes through a door

Why did the lightbulb go out? It was on too long

I saw a guy walking down the street like a black person. I just shook my head and smiled. He WAS black.

Q: What do you call a half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building? A: A half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building.

What do you call love at first sight? A broken heart.

Your mom is so fat, every time she swims in the ocean, north america sinks because of the high water displacement caused by her giant body mass. (V1-V2=m)

Justin Bieber.

What do giant panda bears eat? giant bamboo

You know what sucks? A vacuum.

What did one tree say to the other? "Hey Phil, how's it going?

Why did the chicken get taken into the kitchen? If u dont get this you need to go b ack to school

How many gays does it take to change a light bulb? 1, even if hes not happy im sure he would still be able to change it.

hey

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to end the lives of two male individuals and paralyze the the third male individual from the hip down.

What did the mute say to his friend? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...