Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

knock knock who's there? Madeline McCann really? no

-What do you call it when a female and male are together? - A very serious relationship.

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

You're momma's so fat..Oh wait she's not.

Where did the little boy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

Why did the man suck at basketball? Because he is white, 5 foot 2, and has no arms. Posted By: Lram

A dyslexic woman goes into a saloon and asks for a hair cut. Oh right, she doesn't have hair! Then why the f*** would she enter the saloon? Because she wanted to get her nails done. But she doesn't have nails either, and she doesn't want to drink. She came there because she wanted to hook up with a guy!

I like my coffee like I like my women..... Without Hepatitis.

No deal, blind trust and I help you, or no friendship, and certainly no reason to help you.

What's the difference between Bobby and a plane? Bobby can be sexually molested.

Why did the rabbit cross the road? He was attempting vehicular suicide after being told yet again that he was "silly" and "Trix are for kids."

one day four teenage boys started doing drugs. They jumped off a cliff and died.

A ginger a blond and a burnett where walking in the dessert... They died of heat exhaustion.

Q: What do you call a half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building? A: A half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building.

Guess what i just did. Master bait.

What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

What do you call when you see a man murder 8 black guys? The police.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'll order The Special, what's wrong with you?

how do you make your mom mad? mushroom stamp her face

my mom died because she was morbidly obese

roses are red, bitches are blue close your damn legs and use a condom too.

MAGHBERRY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A cow walks into the butcher shop, he looks around then mourns the loss of his brothers

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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