Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they are all dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

pauls tuck

thumb_up thumb_down +38

knock knock hold on im takin a poop!

thumb_up thumb_down +38

If you have 5 dollars, and Chuck Norris has 5 dollars, you are both very poor.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

In that case you are probably a bit of an outcast as most girls of your beauty are, you know, you are that kind of girl that feels weird because when she got/gets on the buss EVERYONE stares at her, but nobody dares to say anything, right? And when you are hanging out for a drink or something guys stare at you, and go like "nah" which means "Nah she is too good to want me" and starts hitting on your friends instead. Oh and you also get a lot of rude comments from guys "auto disqualifying themselves" like using complements they know will backfire like "Hey wanna fuck sugart1ts? They do this so they can go home with their ego intact thinking "Hey I was tough enough to hit on her, but she turned out to be a bitch! So does any of this sound familiar?

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the chicken cross the road? To find some grain.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did Steve refuse to have sex with a black guy? Because Steve is heterosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

If life gives you lemons your hallucinating

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What do you call two black men in bed? Twix

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why was the young Jewish boy afraid at camp? Because his scoutmaster is a pedophile.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why is the sky blue? I don't know I thought you knew

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What d u tell Simba when he's moving to slow? Muvasa

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Your momma's so broke she might be eligible for government assistance. Seriously she should totally look into it.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Roses are red, Violets are BLACK!

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town? Look, here comes Tarzan! What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town with sunglasses on? Nothing. They don't recognize him.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Pi pi pi pi Pi pi pi pi Pingu Pingu!

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did Santa Clause say to Rudolf? Nothing. Santa's not real.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A woman walks into a bar. Since having equal rights, she too falls unconcious..... Several men walk toward the bar

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Scientific fact: If you took all the veins from your body and laid them end to end, you would die.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

No.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Did you know Hellen Keller had a dog? Niether did she

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Want to hear a funny joke? Womens rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops