A black and a mexican jump off a building, What a tragedy...

Q: What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Q: So what's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? A: The punchline of this joke,

What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They're both Tom Cruise.

Health food.

My heart is in my hands. Or maybe it's yours. Either way it's mine now. You won't need it anymore.

Why doesn't Charlie Sheen take showers? Because he spends too much time on MySpace.

How do you know if there's an elephant in your fridge? The fridge is broken and the elephant has mauled your dog

why did the husband always work late nights? he needed the extra hours to provide for his family

What's red and smells like a rose? Bumble-bees licking honey off of a stick.

Why doesn't Rosa Parks eat bacon? Because she's dead.

Hey, you know what sucks about being blind? You can see.

Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a friend chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

Why was the black man holding the knife in such a particular manner? Because he was getting dinner ready for his family.

A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll you have?" and the duck says "Quack". The bartender is then promptly fired and committed to the nearest mental institution for thinking that ducks can talk and order beer.

What did the 5 cent store clerk say to the customer? That will be 5 cents.

what do you think when you see someone throw a man with no arms and legs into the ocean? chances of survival are minimal

What does tupperware and a walrus have in common? they both like a tight seal

roses are red violets are blue that's just the way god made them

Three politicians walk into a sports bar. Suddenly, everyone is watching the Stanley Cup playoffs.

What did the man say to the jew? How are jew?

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How do you like your eggs in the morning? -Poached or Fertilised?

whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket whats blue and looks like a bucket? a red bucket in disguise

What do you call it when you lend money to a bison? Unitelligent, because bison do not have the ability to purchase things with money so it will most likely just eat the money.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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