Why did you not just "put a spell" on her instead? And you are totally mean, ever actually killed someone?

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because Osama Bin Laden is dead.

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A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. A farmers walks by underneath, and the squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because squirrels can't talk and neither can owls. Then the owl eats the squirrel because it is a bird of prey.

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How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None

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Your mama's p*ssy is so stank, she should probably consult her physician as she may have an easily treatable infection.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Well babies don't have the strength or coordination to hold a paint brush, so you may need to call some painters.

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what is worse than finding a worm in your apple being tricked by your best friend to mule drugs over the boarder and then imprisoned in a Vietnamese jail, where you will most likely will be traded for sex and other horrid act of sodomy, only to escape and work as a sex slave to earn your way home, because that is the life you know now there is no way out you will die here.

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A blonde walks into a bar. She just graduated university and thought she would celebrate with a beer.

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Why did the cat bite its owner's? Because the owner had been dead for several days and the cat was locked in the house with nothing else to eat.

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Because they're dead, they cant screw in a light bulb. Even if they were alive, it would be highly improbable that a baby could screw in a light bulb.

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So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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Knock Knock The homeowner's acquaintance had called him just minutes prior because he had forgotten something at his house. With this having occurred, the homeowner had a strong sense of who was at the door. Being a cautious person however, he checked his prediction by examining the man through the door's peephole. Having asserted that it was what he had in mind, the homeowner opened the door and handed him some papers that were of importance to the acquaintance.

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What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

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Whats worse than burning jews? jews that are alive

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This is not a joke or is it

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What do you call a blonde with big breasts? A woman. Some call her "mom".

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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i once thought i could do crytal meth but then i thought naw better not

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If your waiting in a restaurant for a waiter, doesn't that make you a waiter? O.o

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Yo momma so Fat that she got picked for the Olympic Swim Team

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he thought he saw a dangerous predator in the area and crossed the road in an attempt to flee the dangerous situation.

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What did the guy and girl do at the wedding? Nothing, The guy is gay

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Hehe and Haha are best friends. One day, Haha died. What did Hehe do? He said "Haha! you died!"

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What happens when a jew with a boner runs into a wall? He hurts his face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops