What's black and hangs from a tree? A bat.

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There was this cat, and he was walking down this long road, knowing a dog lived on 45 lake avenue. So the cat was very careful while walking by that house so the dog and his diqqas wouldnt chase the cat, named pat. So like a rogue in the arathi basen lodge, he made his way over the stone wall and ran as quickly as he could through the muddy path of dirt. This cat was also swagged out of control, so he had mad bitches. That is where Pat was heading....... to his mad bitches. He had never met these bitches, but bought them offline on a p0rn website that said he would become the man if he purchased the mad hot bitches. When he found the bitches, he shit himself. The bitches were female dogz. if you read this whole paragraph, a fraction of your soul has been ripped out of you. UMAD? ˜´??

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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25 kids go into the water. shark in the water. 10 come out. Ice cream man deals with the rest of 'em.

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What's red and smells like blood? Blood.

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why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuble prizes.

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What did the girl say to the mute? "Why are you so quiet?" How did the mute respond? He flipped her off.

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What did the train say at the party Thomas isn't really dumb ass

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Q. Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? A. Because he's dead.

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Why was Jimmy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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Why did the fortune cookie taste bad? I forgot to take the wrapper off.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The horses name was Friday.

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I like colin but not as much as apple

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Pineapple.

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Asshole huh? Dont give me any ideas. Again you are not high on weed are you? Then that's really bad.

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A mormon walks into a bar. He orders a caffeine free Coke.

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When im invisible you cant see me, i know

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Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got hitted by a drunken driver and died last week, when he was cycling to school.

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SCENES WHEN TOM O'SHEA GETS STABBED IN PRISON AFTER STEALING THE WHEELS OFF AN AMBULANCE

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What's black and crawls around on eight legs? An octopus that just inked itself.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Why do we learn about the Civil Rights Movement in History class? So it won't happen again.

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What's big and red and if it falls out of a tree and can kill you - a fire truck

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How many immature people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 69

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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