What's the difference between you and a mallet with a cold? Ones a sick duck...I forget what I was about to say but your mother is a whore

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? I got feathers stuck in my cars grill

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What do an eagle and a gopher have in common? They can both fly, except for the gopher

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There are 3 types of people in this world; people who can count, and people who can't

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if a chcken lays an eggg what happens? a baby bird comes out

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Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

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You idiot.

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What is pretty, has big tits, talks like a guy, and has a dick? Your mom giving me a handjob.

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lewis ya baggy fuck

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AAAnd that did not totally send a rush of sweet endorphin's up my spine, I think myself of as really really blunt, I value individualism rather than complete assimilation, I think that, if people want to hear my opinion, they ask me, and if they want to hear what they want to hear, they can ask... Pff, anybody else. I end up insulting a lot of people literally asking for it, but moments like these make it all worth it. I am also extremely superstitious, the catchphra states "Grain of salt" so I wont take your comment completely... I am just screwing around...

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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your momma so dumb she put a battery up her but and said i got the power!!!

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John and Sarah sitting in a tree. K i s s i n g. First comes love. Oops theres goes john-- he's falling---he's falling... he's broken his neck and ruptured his internal organs. D e a t h

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Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? That's the joke.

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doctor , doctor , i feel depressed , we will start you on a course of anti-depressents , vitimins , and daily exercise, make a appointment for next week , and i will referrer you to a phycatrist

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Why do Asians get 50% off on movies? They don't.

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whats worse than jonny james obviously

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Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Q:What did sandy say to spongebob A:Nothing they were both crushed by the water pressure of being at the bottom of the ocean ni,gger

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how do you start a stamped in mexico roll a nickle down the street sad thing is you just lost a nickle

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Q. What did one wall say to the other wall? A. Peekaboo I see you.

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Why did the Asian woman crash her car? She couldn't see through the slits she called eyes.

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What did Helen Keller say when she fell off a cliff? That never happened. I just checked Wikipedia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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