There where ducks sitting in the bath One Duck truns to the other an says "could you pass me the soap" The other duck truns and replies "dont call me toast"

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are red violets are orange......... Wait did I do that wrong?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

knock knock who's there? the milk man the milk man who? the milk man who brings your milk every morning

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what happen to covietz when he licked his balls? nothing he likes the taste

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Suzie was in a traumatizing accident resulting in her arms getting cut off. Knock Knock? Whos There? Not Suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you keep an idiot busy? Why would you wanna keep an idiot busy, it's not gonna make a difference...

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he fell off a cliff

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made this particular man mad which drove him to tell the other man to shut up.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did Johnny lose the race he got jawed by a pack of chimpanzees

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why couldn't the black man swim He never learned how.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Black People

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man walks by with a bat. A little girl crosses the street. He hits her with it because she is a little shit. A homeless atheist sees and reports it immeaditately to the authorities because it was child abuse.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

joke

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Santa isn't real

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was six afraid of seven? Back in middle school, they were both friends. They hung out every day and always had the best fun. It wasn't until their baseball team made it to the junior championship. That was when seven started doping for better strength and endurance for the game. Sevens family and friends (Especially six,) Had started to notice a change in sevens behavior and he seemed more distant from any social relationships with others. Seven began to become angry and self centered and only seemed to be focused on the game. Seven found out that Six knew that he was doping and fought him and brutally injured Six. Seven was then found out by the coaches and was kicked off the team. Seven, knowing that he had ruined his whole life, Shot himself with his dads .38 Revolver.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

TELL

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats the quickest way to a woman's heart? A bilateral incision on the upper left region of the sternum.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why couldn't the kid get in to see the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A Pool Table. Use your imagination.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What does a black person call black friday? Friday

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops