Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken just lost his job and has entered into a deep depression. He was going to commit suicide at the local KFC, but as he walked into the KFC, he saw a beautiful woman. They lived a full and happy life together until the chicken died of old age. Turns out the woman was blind, and partially deaf.

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A white,mexican and asian man are walking together on the beach. They find a genie lamp and the genie says"since there are 3 of u u each get one wish" the black man says " i wish that all the mexicans would go back to mexico. " the asian man says " i wish all the asians would go back to asia" and the white man says " wait so the mexicans and asians arent in america right?" the genie said "that is correct!" the white man says " oh ok ill just taqke a coke then!"

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why the f*** do so many people ask this question?

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Your mom is so fat, that when she stepped on the scale she was disappointed with the number that appeared.

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A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. A farmers walks by underneath, and the squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because squirrels can't talk and neither can owls. Then the owl eats the squirrel because it is a bird of prey.

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Q: Whats the difference between nude pics and your mom? A: I can wackk off to nude pics

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What do you call a black guy with no hair? Bald

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I went to work Got paid, Then came home.

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What did the tree say to himself? Gee-oma-tree( get it geometry say it outloud)

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Text me back when you can. I can't, my fingers got amputated.

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What do Jews and Sloths have in common? They are both Mammals.

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What do you call a mother who is also your aunt and a father who is also your uncle? Incest

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Emergency call: - Please help, my little son swallowed a condom! 5 minutes later - It is ok, I found another one.

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Your momma's so obnoxious, your dad left.

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There were two smokestacks, a little one and a big one. One day, the little one said to the big one, "I'm tired of being the lesser of two smokestacks!"

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Okay lord and master, now get lost, I am trough with you, I have other things to get done, XD My nose is so itchy XD

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whats worse, being kicked in the balls or giving birth? losing an arm to meningitis

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to boys are playing football 1 ses pass tje over ses pass wot

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whats worse than finding out you have Alzheimer's? Finding out you have Alzheimer's

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What happens when a jew with a boner runs into a wall? He hurts his face.

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What do you call a blonde with big breasts? A woman. Some call her "mom".

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Why did the monkey die? he was stapled to a grenade

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You want to know how I got these scars? A horrible knife throwing accident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops