whats the same about a spider and a grape? they both have eight legs, except for the grape.

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One day a child goes to the doctor and says, "it hurts when do this" as he pokes his throat. The doctor, after several well-performed deep tissue testing, diagnosed the child with stage four esophageal cancer. The child cried himself to sleep that night.

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Three logicians were travelling up to Scotland in a train. They saw a black cow standing parallel to the train tracks; the first sign of life since crossing the border. The first logician says "Oh, so they do have black cows in Scotland." The second logician says "No, they have at least one black cow in Scotland." The third logician says "No, they have at least one cow in Scotland, one side of which, at least, is black."

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Why can't jesus hold skittles? They'd fall through his hands.

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a man gets raped. -teagan doherty-

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Your mom is so fat...

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What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

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How do you kill two birds with one stone. You don't its not humanly possible because birds cannot be killed with rocks.

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why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock! who's there? not suzy.

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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A man makes a sandwich.

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if you dont like sponge bob refrences.......... THEN **DOLPHIN NOISE*** you

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A man walks into a bar, and says ouch.

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Whats the best way to get to a girls heart? A knife.

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A black man and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? Nobody, the car is parked while they look at a map for directions because doing that while you are driving would be very dangerous and could result in a collision.

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justin beiber has a penis hahahahahahhaah lol not really

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WEED!

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What do you call a donkey that can't speak? Whatever you want to call it...I prefer to call it a donkey that can't speak!

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whats red with blue spots and is highly inteligent? an apple. i lied to you and am sorry

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Why was the blonde girl stupid? She had suffered sever brain damage the previous month and was still recovering.

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Marrage s like a card game. You start off with 2 hearts and 1 diamond. You end up wishing for a club and a spade!

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Why did the woman lie down? She was dead

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I can't hear music. I am a sentence.

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What's black and white and red all over? Nothing, becuse if something is red all over it cannot be black nor white.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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