What's white and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did Johnny fall off his bike? Because Johnny's a goldfish.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red, Violets are blue. A family is tied-up and screaming for help in my basement.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and deaf, and to put her behind the wheel of a motorized vehicle would be extremely dangerous.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Hearing this joke again.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, wanna f***.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats that cool sound it makes when you thumbs a comment?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

If life gives you lemons ask where they came from.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red Violets are blue I am adopted And so are you

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's brown and sticky? A piece of toffee, which is brown and/or dark brown in color.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers who are you?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? Getting shot in the gut What's worse than that? Getting raped in the hole made by the bullet

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the penguin die? He was anti-social and would rather die than huddle. So he died. THE END

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? To be eaten.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a Jewish wanna be gangster? Drake

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats white a smells like paint. whtie paint.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What do the Terms of Service say? A: I dont know, I didnt read them.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

An Irishman, an Englishman and a Scott land on an island. They were on vacation and returned to the UK, which consists of two isles.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was the asian boy made fun of in the locker room? Because of the nipple piercing he had.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What makes a good jack-o-lantern? A pumpkin

thumb_up thumb_down -8

yo mamma is so stupid she failed high school

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon and Micheal Jackson molests little boys.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops