A man walks outside on a sunny day. Since the sun was very bright, he put on a pair of sunglasses. While this was going on, nothing else really happened and he went on with his day as usual.

How do you stop your child from picking his nose? Cut his hands off

Why did the Jew have very bad gas? He had very rough anal sex and air got stuck up his bum

I was (really) asked one day by a guy if I wanted to star in a porn movie... Before I could even think about it he asked my 14 year old sister "Do you want to join in too?" And that kids, is why I am stuck in jail for pushing up a boot up a guys ass... Well replace boot with dick, and guys ass with my 14 year old sister and yeah... Naw... seriously she has hueg boobs though... at the age of 14, damn those melons have not even gone a bit greenish yellow and they are still growing... ...Hey Cassandra, its NeroMetal, good thing I am not your brother and that you are 19 right? NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THAT NEROISM DUDE THAT CHATS HERE, I play videogames, and write books, and sign books... ...Then some guy sees my real name is Nero and goes that guy on horsehead network? Who? HE SUCKS! SUCKS ASS!

EAT YOUR DINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless you're paralyzed.

Justin's humor

why did the black boy read a book. Because he had a book report due next week

Why is the sky blue? I don't know I thought you knew

Black people

Think of a number between 2 and 10? 3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399375105820974944592307816406286 208998628034825342117067982148086513282306647093844609550582231725359408128481 11745028410270193852110555964462294895493038

Whats as flat as a pancake and alive Ya nan being flattened by a truck on the motorway

Roses are red Voilets are blue I have a gun Get in the Van

Pete and Repete are sitting on a fence. Pete falls off. Pete suffers from a scraped knee and a bruised tailbone.

Why don't dinosaurs talk anymore? Because they're all dead, duh. :P

where are the maternaty clothing in walmart???? The C section

There is a high speed police pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns to the other and says "Moo".

Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side (The original AntiJoke)

How did the fat man avoid getting dehydrated? Fat men don't excersise and therefore cannot become dehydrated.

Why was the broom late? Cause he overSWEPT!!! ahahahahahaha!

Where did Sally go in the bombing? Everywhere

How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? Depends on how big the lightbulb is

If life gives you lemons your hallucinating

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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