Why can't a Tyrannosaurus-Rex clap? It's Dead.

What is black, white and red all over? A black, white and red pen.

A man walks into a bar. He backs up, unwraps it, and enjoys its chocolatey deliciousness.

whats black and blue and red all over? my wife shhh!

WUT SMELLS ? my poo

have you heard of the new german microwave? it seats about 30

How do you make a tissue dance? Blow a little boogie in it!

Sticks and stones may break my bones and they can also break cars.

what do you call a black man drinking cool-aid? thirsty.

What do you call an englishman who wakes up in Africa Confused

Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird

A Boy Walks Up To A Frog At the Bus Stop And Says, “Why Are You So Upset?” And The Frog Replied, “I’m Waiting For The Bus Because My Car Just Got TOAD!”

Why did the chicken cross the road Because it's a free country chickens are free to do as they please

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? Wow, I need to lighten up on the acid.

Whats more painful than falling onto a sharp stone? Suffering the loss of your mother and newborn brother in a tragic car accident on your birthday.

Where is the last place you would find a Mexican? In a good hiding spot that you didn't think of while trying to find him.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because its a horse and cant speak or understand english and gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables and stools.

A father walks in on his kid masturbating to pictures of horses and promptly divorces his wife.

What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

What did the suicide bomber say on new years day? Happy new year.

What is the difference between a baby and a rat? I don't have a rat in a cage

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

Why doesn't a chicken wear pants? Because, there are no tailors in the area who make pants suitable for chickens to wear.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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