Why does Santa Clause not have children? Because he only "comes" once a year

A creationist, an evolutionist, and Neanderthal Man walk into a bar. They order two beers and a glass of red wine. The bartender asks: "Will that be all?". The evolutionist says "Yes"

There once was a man from Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe He then shortly died in his sleep due to heart failure at the age of 81.

why did the the chicken cross the road? because some sad,board people wanted to make a joke

How do you kill a woman? Let her drive

Why didn't the vampire go to the Garlic festival? Because it sucks.

What do you call a man with no heart? Dead

How much does a Polar Bear weigh? Approximately 500 lbs

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock-eater.

I have adhd theref- hey look a dandelion

What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

What did the mental patient say to the apple? Hi, my name is Chris.

Q. What's brown and circular? A. MEATBALLS!

- Knock knock - Who's th.....AIDS

The person below me is weird.

Yo mammals so stupid, she's got AIDS!

Why did the black guy fell from the stairs? Because I threw him

What did the monk give to the cancer patient? His love and reassurance.

you know what they say, Big man, Big hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, shame he died

What do you call a black man with a job? An employee

how many black men did it take to steal from the whitehouse? Obama.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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