What's worse than a dead baby? The corpse is chopped into little pieces And is put in a blender. Worse than that? An alive baby stuffed into a blender. Worse than that? Hellen Keller put into a blender. Worse than that? The holocaust.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

yo mamas so old she probably ralises the greater risk of breast cancer in middle age women.

Why are tests such a pain in the ass? Because your vomiting shit you'd learned the night before.

Darude - Sandstorm

What do you call a blank white sheet of paper? Printer paper most likely

Roses are red Violets are blue God makes things beautiful... What happened to you

Q:Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? A:He slipped and fell. Q2:Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2:He was stapled to the first monkey. Q3:Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3:Peer pressure.

How do you get a fat man to go outside? Blow up his house

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "God" "Then come right in!"

John has 7 apples and Lisa has 4 apples John eats 3 apples and Lisa eats 1 apple and give another to John Their diets lacks various essential nutrients

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter ponder with cheese.

Q: Why was the little boy upset? A: His nose was glued to the sidewalk.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The horses name was Friday.

What did walt disney say to the Jew? Nothing. Walt Disney didn't know the man was Jewish and didn't have time to make himself acquainted with the fellow.

why did the kid drop his ice cream? because he got ran over by a bus! (not a original, just funny)

What' do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's puzsy

How many immature people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 69

my great great grandpa ryan the rattlesnake had a cat named dog-

What did the man say to his doctor? AHHH AHHHHH OH MY GOD! AHHH OUCH HOLY SHIT FUUUUUUCK!!!... ____/\_____/\_____/\___________________

Have you ever seen Hellen Keller's house? Well it was really nice.

WEED!

so 3 guys walk into a bar.....the 4th one ducks

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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MOAR??

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