*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

Is that a baby in your carriage or are you just happ..... WTF. WHERES ITS EYES!? **purges**

What do you call an asian man driving a plane? Well you can't drive planes

Where can I find a good Prostitute? Your Parents House.

If I am from Texas, where are you from? You know the answer? HOLY SH*T! YOU ARE A GENIUS!

What starts with a P and ends with O-R-N? porn

Knock knock. who's there? Strawberry! Strawberry who? Pickle!

What do you call a black airline pilot? Captain, you big racist.

What do you call a dog that's having a stroke? An emergency animal hospital.

What's funnier than 24? NOTHING!!!

Why was the sex offender sweating in the playground? Because he was pushing his over weight son on the swing.

If an orange is orange then why isn't a banana called a yellow? Because the word 'banana' comes from the Arabic word for finger as it obviously resembles a finger. The person that named the orange was equally lazy, but just not Arabic.

How do you make a momma bird not fly back to its nest? Burn it down!!

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, a dead baby is a horrible sight and shouldn't be laughed at.

Why did the little boy drop his ice-cream? He was run over by a bus and died instantly.

Charlie Sheen is winning

A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

What has four wheels, two wings, and flies? A bird...I was kidding about the wheels.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? He didn't, the farm this chicken was on had fences bordering it to avoid this very situation.

so a square said to another square,your rather obtuse oh wait squares cant talk,whats going on. later that day,chuckles realizes he isnt funny -chuckles

What did the whale say when he ran into a wall? - Oh Shit

What do you call a hobo that lives a in a box. A hobo

theres a fork in a drawer half way open and a knife in a cup on the counter. how does the knife get into the drawer, it cant knife are incapable of moving

A man ordered tomato and basil, but received tomato with a man. the man's name is Basil!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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