What did the firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire? -Let's go home

a man walks in to a bar he says "what can i get for a free beer" the bartender says "okay but first you have to make my donkey laugh" so he goes in there and makes it laugh and gets a free beer ant then the next day he goes in and says "what can i get for a free beer" the bartender says "okay but first you have to make my donkey cry" so he goes in there and makes the horse cry and the bartender says " i will give you a free beer but first tell me what you did to make my donkey laugh and cry" the man says " first to make the donkey laugh i told the donkey i had a bigger penis than him then to make him cry i showed him

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic And so am I

Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

Do you know what a third world bathroom smells like? Crap

Knock... Knock... Who's there? AIDS.

Q: What did the latino kid get for christmas? A; Nothing because he died two days before

What did the man do after he rented a movie? He watched it

Yesterday I was diagnosed with Depression... It made me sad.

Why is Tom Garrick gay Answer- Because he is

When life hands you lemons... do not squeeze them, for juice may squirt into your eye, causing severe pain.

What did Jennifer get in her college exam? She got a C minus

why did justin fuck alice and maliyah to have fun

What is the difference between a black man and a speed bump? A black man is a living thing and a speed bump is not.

Why did the dog eat poop?

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? One has a complex circulatory system the other is a pizza.

A man says to a boy. I bet you I can jump over that mountain. The boy wins the bet because it is a physical impossibility to jump over a mountain.

Why did the grandmother lock her grandson in the closet? Because she didn't love him.

No one walks into a bar... because it was closed.

An irishman walks into a bar and orders a beer.

a woman leaves the kitchen.......

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

I like my coffee like I like my women..... Without Hepatitis.

A ginger a blond and a burnett where walking in the dessert... They died of heat exhaustion.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...