Knock knock. who's there? Strawberry! Strawberry who? Pickle!

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman

A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

Two men walk into a bar. It turns out the bar was a lever and set off a bomb. They both died.

Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

Your mama's so stupid... She scored below average on a recent IQ test.

What's worse than a bad test score? Getting hit buy a train!!

Do you play piano? No

The Game

how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his whole family

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will have her institutionalized as soon as they find her.

This is a joke

Two cowboys are in a kitchen. The first one says, "I feel at Home on the range!" To which the second replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he has never pursued his real dream.

What do you call a politician on fire? A tragic death for the American public..

Man 1: WHAT THE HELL?!?! Man 2: There is no verb in that sentence

Yo momma's so bulimic, and there's nothing funny about it at all.

What do a black man and an apple have in common? They are both carbon based life forms.

What's faster than a Jew running after a penny? A car.

Why did Susie fall off the swing Because she had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there... Not Susie Why did the plane crash Susie was flying it

Q: what did the nazi say to the other nazi A: hallo

what did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? cancer

Why does Nathan Rogers never get any pussy? Because goblins have small dicks

Why are there so many black basketball players? Because they aren't green.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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