Who's there? Knock Knock.

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A brown haired woman walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor it hurts whenever I touch myself." The doctor says, "Strange, I have never heard of such a disease. Please show me." The woman touches her leg and screams,"Ow!" Then she touches her arm and screams again. The doctor asks, "Are you a natural brunette?" The woman replies, "No, I am a blonde." The doctor says, "Oh, that explains it. You have a broken finger. God, you are so blonde." The woman gets her finger treated and then lives in agony for the rest of her life due to her untreated broken leg and arm.

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If I have 7 oranges in one hand and 8 oranges in the other, what do I have? Big hands!

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What did the duck wear to go swimming? A bathingsuit!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have alzheimers, Roses are red

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what can't you see but stalks you all day and night? ME!!!

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What did the heart surgeon say to the brain surgeon? We are both surgeons

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How do you get a Black Person out of a tree? Well, if he is stuck call 911 itmediatly!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball. Super Monkey Ball who? No wonder it's super.

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What's the tallest building in the world? A library cause it has so many stories get it haha.

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What happened to Johnny when he fell of his bike? He had a seizure, went into a coma, and forced his parents to take him off life support. Happy birthday Johnny.

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what is the difference between oral and anal? anal makes your day and anal makes your whole weak

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Rose are red Violets are blue And I really hate you Friends?????

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Why did the kid have no arms? A clown came and chopped them off.

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What did the midget say to the other midget? "We're midgets"

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A black guy and his black girlfriend are in a car. Who's driving? Their driver. The black guy has a very prosperous career and their life is at the envy of many.

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Violets are blue, Roses are red. The sentence before was completely irrelevant, but I needed something to say before I tell you, Your family's been murdered by the KKK.

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A dog walks into the local newspaper to place an ad. The dog writes; "woof woof, woof woof woof." Receptionist: You know you can ad another two woofs for the same price? Dog: Well that wouldn't make any sense at all?

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A black guy walks up to the cash register at a gas station with his hands in his pockets... He pulls out a 5 dollar bill and buys a pack of gum.

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Why did the black guy get hit by a train? I strapped him to the tracks

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting r.aped by a giant scorpion.

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Why did the girl fall off her bike? I threw a ball at her.

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A man walked into a bar with his friend. He drinks a certain amount of beers, and has his friend safely drive him home.

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what did one dog say to another dog? ....nothing, because they can only bark.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops