How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

There are two muffins in an oven. The first muffin says, "Is it just me, or is it getting hot in here?". The second one says, "Hey, look! A talkin' muffin!".

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A: u wanna die B: that is a stupid question because unless u are suicidal u will not, retorical or not A: i do wanna die B: u should get some help u freak person a never did get help, while walking to a certivied psychiatrict evaluater he got hit by a truck. his body can be found at the intersection of church and flatbush, brooklyn. JK he got shot, he was in brookly, duh.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Go home and hang yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

knock knock. Who's there... Mormans

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had several drinks, conversed animatedly, and heartily enjoyed themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

In Soviet Russia, table flip you! ???? ? /(. - . \?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a black girl scout? A brownie

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's brown and sticky? A stick

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What was the last thing going through the man's mind who cleans the 90th floor windows on the World Trade Center on 9/11? The 91st floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is black, white and red all over? A black man has been shot and a white paramedic is standing over him trying to save his life.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? About 4:30, unless he's running late, stuck in traffic, had to get gas.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q. How did the blind man survive from walking of a cliff? A. He didn't he died

thumb_up thumb_down -2

jamie looks at jacob for arousment. jacob looks at his dog.........

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the man put his penis in the baby? Because it's warmer than a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than stepping on a snail? Stepping on a bear trap.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the homeless man kill his dog? Because a drunk rich guy said he'd pay him a hundred dollars if he did.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

whats worse than school? Summer school

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's black and blue and afraid of sex The twelve year Old boy in my trunk

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the man go to sleep at 9:30? Because his mom told him to

thumb_up thumb_down -4

James: They say attitudes are contagious. Bill: How do you know? James: My whole family caught it and they will all die within 2 weeks.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's black, white, and red all over? The color scheme. Except for the black and white. They're shades.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the black man say "I been done did that?" He was speaking ebonics.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops