why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

How many amoebas does it take to change a light bulb? Depending on your religious belief and the variation in evolutionary growth, a full study on the answer would require immense time and be very costly. I would also not feel comfortable providing an answer based on opinion or estimated guess. The answer is therefor be inconclusive.

Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Because he was dangerously fatigued from staying up all night weeping passionately into the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of twenty years after the CEO of the company declared bankruptcy and finding out that his only daughter was in the hospital in critical condition after her school bus flipped off a bridge.

What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide? where to find some cheap cyanide

Why was Newton surprised when the apple fell on his head? Because he was sitting under a pear tree.

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

How did the chicken get to the other side? He didnt, he got ran over.

Why did the little girl fall of the swing? -because she had no arms Why didn't she get back up? -because she had no legs Why diddn't anyone help her? -because she was black.

What does Santa Claus keep in his gardening shed? Nothing. Santa Claus isn't real.

Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Bushes are Red, Trees are Red... my garden is on fire...

I think people who go to see a psychiatrist need their head examining.

What happened when Mary threw a kettle at Daniel? Daniel was scalded in the facial area and was blinded forever.

What do you call somebody pimping out their bitches for very large amounts of money???? A dog breeder.

the love boat

What does a carrot and a potato have in common? They're both not chocolate

Poop swing

What happens if you confuse your male best friend's and your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, their both named Adam.

A horse walks into a bar... The bartender is amazed at the fact that an animal that possesses neither the mental nor the physical abilities to open doors, still managed to enter the bar without breaking anything.

Knock knock. Racism.

Why did the black guy scream? well, he just saw his friend get shot, and there was blood everywhere.

"Knock, Knock" "who's there" "John doe" "John doe who" "I told you my my name was john doe"

Chrysanthemums our orange violettes are musical

Why did Max drink the red Gatorade? Because he likes it more than all of the other flavors.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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