whats 2+2? 4

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a pressure-sensitive explosive device.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Marmite.

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I saw a "Baby on Board" bumper sticker on a car TARGET AQUIRED

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What is black, white, and red all over? A bleeding zebra.

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If the best things in life are free, whats the hardest things in life? Death.

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roses are blue, violets are red, im colorblind

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Knock Knock. I paid good money for a doorbell. Use it, please.

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Why'd the girl fall of her scooter? She fell into a hole and died. She was never found again. All that was left was her scooter.

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Your mom is a whore bitchy virgin

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7

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Chuck Norris can count from 1 to 100... twice!

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what is the difference between coke and pepsi? -they are competing soft drinks made by different brands

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i dont like chris

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.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because while he was swinging, his friends dared him to jump off and called him a chicken when he didn't. Still hesitant, he tried to jump off, but his arm caught on the swing chain and he fell face first into the tanbark. He needs reconstructive surgery to repair his face.

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What can move people but not rocks.. Poop

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Q: Where can you find a cat with no arms and no legs? A: Right where you left him Q: Where can you find a dog with no arms and no legs? A: In a bun

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A little boy uses a horrible curse against his classmate. The classmate is so angry he tells the teacher. The teacher is so astounded at the little boy's use of language he sends him to the principal. When the principal hears of the foul language he's so ashamed he calls the police. The police can't believe the little boy said such a bad word, they think he deserves to go to court. The court dates are set up. When the Judge hears of the hate words he can think of no other worthy punishment except prison until he turns 21. After the kid is let out he heads for the bar across town where all the ex-prisoners go. He orders up a drink, bartender asks "What'd you do?". The kid explains the curse to the bartender. The barkeep becomes so upset that he kicks the kid out of the bar. While crossing the street to go to another bar he gets hit by a truck. Whats the moral of the story? Look both ways before crossing the street....

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Knock Knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said, who's there? KNOCK KNOCK OH MY GOD, WHO IS IT??? Yes, we have your daughter here, she was caught doing drugs on school property.

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What does a Jewish Santa Clause say? This scenario is highly improbable as Jews celebrate Hanukkah and not Christmas.

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penis

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- My grand mother died. - I'm sorry.... Did She died of old age ? - No, she got eaten by a giant worm.

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Basically copying you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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