What's a fun thing to do on a plane? Make a bolt to the pilot, smash his brains in with a iron pipe and make the plane plummet a few hundred feet with a maniacal laugh until you wake up from your dream and scream at your mother to wipe you.

What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? The black man has a family of four and is working 12 hours a day at a minimum wage job to afford the high rent, the utility bills, and to buy the pizza to feed his family.

What is the difference between a shark and a human? A shark is a type of fish with a full cartilaginous skeleton and a highly streamlined body and a human is the only living species in the Homo genus.

What did the hungry man do? He ate.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

I'm a champion. I do what I want.

If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? A testicle

wommmoaooammaaa

I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

Why did the man die? He got shot!

What is difference about : Pizza and Jews on the Holocaust? Pizza don't scream when she gets into the oven!

What is translucent and smells like a carrot ? A translucent carrot.

Yo mama is so depressing. That is so sad.

why did the dog chase it's tail? it has a case of OCD where he was obsessed with catching his tail and would spin until he passed out or threw up.

Two penguins are sitting on an ice flow. One says to the other: "hey--you know, it looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other one says, "who says I'm not?"

im gunna build a lego house what shud i make it out of

Q: What did the man do when he won the lottery? A: He kept it for himself and left his family.

whats worse than being late to school haveing your family killed by an angry peice of toast

How do you get money out of a Jew? You convince him your cause is worthwhile.

Darude- Sandstorm

How do you make a tissue dance? Blow a little boogie in it!

Why did the little boy have a gun pointed at his head? Because he hated his life and wanted to kill himself.

Mark Wilson

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but GET IN THE VAN

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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