they sent me too your moms house and 9 months later you are here

I heard a scary rumor that when you plzy a windows istaller cd backwards, it plays a secret message, but what's even scarier, is that when you play it forwards, it installs windows.

How many beavers can you fit in one paddling pool? None; it's probably very dangerous trying

if your mother was put in a situation where she could either have sex with a man or a woman she would pick the woman

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Yo mamma is so old that she died.

Random letters vJKkBvCffsgfsjxmsocowdbwfeascbsa

How do you stop a bird from flying? Shoot it with a harpoon gun.

whats the difference between a pair of shoes, and a computer. alot.

A blonde and a brunette are falling from a cliff. They are going to die.

What's clear on the outside and grey on the inside? An elephant in a plastic bag.

25

"Hheheheh Hey Butthead"- "Were Gonna Score!"

Why did Jimmy eat the apple? Because he was obese and needed to eat healthy because his doctor suggested it.

How much does a Polar Bear weigh? Approximately 500 lbs

Why don't carrot tops souls ? They just don't

If Jimmy has $5, and he finds $20 on the street, how much money does Jim have? None. He was mugged by a black man.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An Afronaut

please ignore the bottom two 'jokes' as they were written by josh carey and ryan danielz

A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

What's worse than getting stabbed Getting stabbed two times

You are walking down the street, and a man keeps on getting in your way. You want to politely... Screw it already and stab him in the back

Knock knock Who's there? Taco Taco who? Taco bell

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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