How did you know it was bedtime at Michael Jackson's house? When his clock's big hand met the little hand, usually at 10 or 11, though sometimes later if he had a concert that night.

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Why was the boy sad? He had just had his legs amputated and will never walk again.

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A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

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why was it funny that the boy got a razor for christmas because he had leukemia

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What starts with "m" and rhymes with monkey? Platypus

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Im thinking of a very long word..... L O N G

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What's the difference between hot tea and cold tea? The temperature.

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How do you confuse a gay person? How? 7

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How do you make a plumber cry? Tell him that Luigi beat him to the princess

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one being irish and the other chinese. now they both happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china, where as the chinese man had not committed any crime.

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Your mumma is so stupid her IQ is 40.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Bananas can't talk.

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Is that a threat or a promise? dragonflies

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How many ADD kids does it take to change a light bulb? Wanna ride bikes?

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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A guy walks into a bar... Ouch

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What was the last song those aboard the Titanic sang? "Staying alive"

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What's worse than shoveling dead babies??? Using a pitchfork...

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What's Big, Brown and really Runny ??? It doesn't matter anymore, i'll just leave the Toilet !!

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Whats worse than a rotten tomato. a fridge hitting your baby.

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You know whats worse than finding 3 dead children in your house? Finding 2 dead children in your house.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have difficulty understanding each other.

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how do you know when an elephant been in your refridgrator The door wont close

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knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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