What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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What was the last thing the clown said to his wife before she died? Rebecca, just stay with me, the ambulance is almost here.

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tight butthole 4 lyfe.

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What's brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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What's worse than giong to Hell? Nothing. Hell is as bad as it gets.

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Q. What's green, has wheels and flies? A. A garbage truck.

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What did the bartender say to the bugatti owner? "Don't drink and drive"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Friend: "Hey man! Did you hear about the kid who bought the last hamster at the pet shop? Other friend: "No..." Friend: "Oh, well he shot himself last night."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Herpes, Now you do too.

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I just farted, and now I have to Chit!

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How do you upset an Mexican? Kill his entire family.

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What did the suicide bomber say on new years day? Happy new year.

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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Why was the blonde fired from her job as a nurse? Because she ate all the babies in the nursery (She didn't even leave one for the director of the hospital to eat!)

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Roses are blue Violets are red Crap, I already messed up the joke.

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why did the chicken cross the road because the farm is across the street from were it is now

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Roses are red Violets are astronaut This joke didn't make sense I'll kill u with a rake

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Why did the man die? Because he was unpopular and someone killed him with a gun. He is now dead. RIP.

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whats worse then being a black kid with out a father? is not that bad it happens all the time

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Q: What's worse than eating cauliflowers? A: Eating cauliflowers and getting raped by Jerry Sandusky at the age of 7.

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What do you call a gay dog? Steve

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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What did the duck say to the mouse? Quack!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops