How did the fat man avoid getting dehydrated? Fat men don't excersise and therefore cannot become dehydrated.

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, who shat in my garden

What's Mary short for? She's got no legs.

Why was 6 afraid of seven? Seven brutally abused and raped 6 as a child.

What goes in dry, comes out wet and pleases two people. A teabag, you pervert.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm dyslexic couldn't tell, could you?

why did the little girl fall out of the tree? She didnt have any arms

I didn't choose the thug life... I got a job.

dfasdf sdf ds fds fds f sdf s fs

A man is approached by a mysterious character in the streets, offering to tell him a dark and amazing tale. The man declines and walks away.

WUT SMELLS ? my poo

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

What's spongy and smells of treacle? Treacle sponge

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

A deaf lion tried to kill a zebra. It succeeded.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Someone threw birdseed.

Why does Snoop Dogg have an umberella? For shielding himself from the rain.

What did the pregnant teenager get for her birthday? An abortion.

Yo Mama so slow She can't run very fast.

Your Black, Im Black, We're all Black

What does Steven Hawking and Justin Bieber have in common? Absolutely nothing.

What do you call shark with no dorsal fin? Unused ingredients for soup.

How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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