What did the sting ray say to steve irwin? It doesn't matter , steve irwin is dead, dead as a doormat.

How to do you kill a blonde? Various methods, most effective of which is firing squad

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool The tragic drowning of a quadrapalegic

(This is a joke made up by the young son of a friend of mine many years ago. It is still one of my favorite jokes.) Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

Q. What's green, has wheels and flies? A. A garbage truck.

What's worse than giong to Hell? Nothing. Hell is as bad as it gets.

What's brown and smells like shit? Shit.

tight butthole 4 lyfe.

What did the bartender say to the bugatti owner? "Don't drink and drive"

What was the last thing the clown said to his wife before she died? Rebecca, just stay with me, the ambulance is almost here.

What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

Friend: "Hey man! Did you hear about the kid who bought the last hamster at the pet shop? Other friend: "No..." Friend: "Oh, well he shot himself last night."

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Herpes, Now you do too.

I just farted, and now I have to Chit!

How do you upset an Mexican? Kill his entire family.

What did the suicide bomber say on new years day? Happy new year.

Why was the blonde fired from her job as a nurse? Because she ate all the babies in the nursery (She didn't even leave one for the director of the hospital to eat!)

An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

Roses are blue Violets are red Crap, I already messed up the joke.

why did the chicken cross the road because the farm is across the street from were it is now

Roses are red Violets are astronaut This joke didn't make sense I'll kill u with a rake

Why did the man die? Because he was unpopular and someone killed him with a gun. He is now dead. RIP.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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