John and Sarah sitting in a tree. K i s s i n g. First comes love. Oops theres goes john-- he's falling---he's falling... he's broken his neck and ruptured his internal organs. D e a t h

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jelly is a clear or translucent fruit spread made from sweetened fruit juice, and set using naturally occurring pectin. Jam contains both fruit juice and pieces of fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Did you hear about the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13 for sexual content/nudity, language, and some violence.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

From the makers of Call of Duty 1, comes Call of Duty 2.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

In soviet russia, roses are violet

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why the kid can't get off the water? Because your feet is on his head

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are Black Violets are Black I am color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why was 6 afraid of 7?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why do Christians believe in God? They made him up

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why is everyone always picking on ruth? because they just do

thumb_up thumb_down -12

<=3 penis

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when an electrical malfunction disabled all of the aircraft's electronic navigation and communications equipment. Due to the clouds and haze, the pilot could not determine the helicopter's position. The pilot saw a tall building, flew toward it, circled, and held up a handwritten sign that said "WHERE AM I?" in large letters. People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign said "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER." The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map, determined the course to steer to SEATAC airport, and landed safely. After they were on the ground, the copilot asked the pilot how he had done it. "I knew it had to be the Microsoft Building, because they gave me a technically correct but completely useless answer."

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a blue penquin dipped in chocolate doing the samba? A blue penquin dipped in chocolate doing the samba!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

You know what's really funny? Cancer What's funnier than that? The Holocaust Even funnier? Charlie Sheen

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ?... because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -12

(Guy)That's what she said. (His Girlfriend) And who is this she.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 has been convicted on multiple accounts of murder and Grievous Bodily Harm

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down -12

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

the doctor says to the patient " i have some good news and some bad news" the patient says well what is it dock " well the good news is your fine " the patient asked what the bad news was and the doctor said " i lied about you being fine you have aids, and testicular cancer and you have 2 days to live"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops