A black man, a white man, and a Mexican walk into a bar. The bartender kicks them out because he doesn't have time for another crappy joke; as the bar is very crowded that night.

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A neutron walks into a bar. He orders a drink and ponders why his mother gave him the name, "A neutron."

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Why did the meme cross the road? MEME XD

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How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? The same amount as white people, stop being racist.

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A black man orders a pizza to be delivered to his house. He is delightfully pleased at the speed in which the pizza was delivered and decided he would order from that pizza shop again in the near future.

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What do you do when your phone goes off in class? Stay behind after class whilst the teacher takes off his pants and tells you do bend over a desk. This is your punishment.

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What did the man say to the waiter when he was about to tip him? I'm not gay, but $20 is $20.

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A pink bird and a pink elephant was out flying. Then something happened.

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69 HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *goes crazy and shoots himself*

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So this farmer had theses two amazingly fast horses, one named slokey and the other pokey. They would run in the pasture and bring many people to watch. So one day this man says hey, you should enter them in the county derby. So he does and the whole race its slokey, pokey slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. So after the farmer collects his prize money a man walks up and says, hey those horses are pretty fast, you should enter them in the state derby. So he loads his horses up to the capital and prepares them. When the gates open slokey and pokey dash out of the gate. The whole race its slokey, pokey, slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. After all the press conferences a man says, hey you should enter those horses in the kentucky derby. So the farmer enters them and drives down to kentucky. The gates open and the whole time its slokey, pokey, slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. After the press meetings a man says hey you should enter your horses in the european derby. The farmer says no, im going to retire my horses. One fall afternoon pokey says to slokey, man, i wish i could have won a single race. So they race around the huge pasture and the whole way its slokey, pokey, slokey pokey, and pokey wins by a nose! All the farm animals go crazy and the farm dog says "congratulations pokey you finally won!" And pokey says "HOLY SHIT A TALKING DOG!"

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What's great about taking a shower with a twelve year old girl. Pulling her hair back and making her look like a six year old

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I have a black guy on my family tree. He's my cousin.

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I was going to post some witty jokes, but then I realized they weren't funny.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a Jew. The elephant has elephant cancer.

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There was a hundred dollar note lying flat on the ground. The homeless guy didn't pick it up and walked on because he didn't see it.

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An Irishman walks out of a pub. Just kidding.

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What's blue and can't sing? Blue.

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What's worse than tieing a baby to a moving fan? Stopping it with a shovel

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz 7 8 9

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A married couple is arguing over the temperature in their house. The wife wants it at 62 degrees and the husband wants it at 74. What should they do? Nothing while they are arguing their daughter decides to put it at 32 and freeze them to death

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knock knock? who's there? ted? ted who? stop f***ing around, you got cancer.

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If it wasn't for my horse I'd never go to college.

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Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose!

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Why did the little boy cry regularly? Because his father was sexually abusive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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